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Sermon Illustrations: Hearing God's Voice

A woman is said to have gone to John Osteen and said, "A brother has spoken to me and said the Lord is sending me to Africa." John Osteen replied, "If you do go you'd better take that brother with you otherwise you won't know when to come back, will you?"

A wife was suing her husband for divorce and accused him of not speaking to her in five years. "What have you got to say for yourself?" asked the horrified magistrate. The husband replied meekly, "Well, er, I didn't like to interrupt".

In Rome, there is a sculpture of Moses carved in marble by Michelangelo. When finished, he was so overcome with its life-like features he said, "Speak! Why don't you speak to me?" Perhaps it broke his heart that he couldn't talk with the object of beauty he created.

Hallmark Father's Day card: "Dad, thanks to your lectures I never change horses in the middle of a job worth doing, I know the squeaky wheel gets the worm, and I never count my chickens until I've walked a mile in their shoes ... And you thought I wasn't listening."

When a desire keeps coming back to you constantly, take note because God often talks to us through desire. Andrew Evans [See Ps 37:4]

My Collection of Jokes, Quotes & Anecdotes

Duncan Campbell was apparently at a conference when he had a strong feeling to go to the Hebrides. When he arrived, he made his way up to the church where the cleaner was going about his work. "What's happening here?" he asked. "We have a speaker tonight," said the cleaner. "What is his name?" "Duncan Campbell." "But I'm Duncan Campbell! How did you know I was coming?" "How did you know to come?"

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Please note that all Scripture quotations, unless otherwise stated, are taken from the New King James Version ®.
© 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.