Sermon Illustrations: Emergencies

Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency? Caller: I have heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on the corner. Dispatcher: Do you have an address? Caller: No, I'm wearing a blouse and slacks. Why?

Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency? Caller: Hi, is this the police? Dispatcher: This is 911, do you need police assistance? Caller: Well I don't know who to call. Can you tell me how to cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before.

Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency? Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it. Dispatcher: This is nine eleven. Caller: I thought you just said it was nine one one. Dispatcher: Yes ma'am, nine one one and nine eleven are the same thing. Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.

Dispatcher: 9-1-1. What is your emergency? Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart. Dispatcher: Is this her first child? Caller: No, you idiot. This is her husband.