educate equip enable
You know you're drinking too much coffee when: The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse. You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked. You grind your coffee beans in your mouth. You watch videos on fast-forward. You lick your coffee pot clean. Your eyes stay open when you sneeze. You can type 60 words a minute with your feet. You can jump-start your car without cables. Your only source of nutrition comes from Sugarine. You don't sweat, you percolate. You've worn out the handle on your favourite coffee mug. You go to AA meetings for the free coffee. You've worn the finish off your coffee table. Starbuck's owns the mortgage on your house. You're so wired you pick up FM radio. You sleep with your eyes open. Instant coffee takes too long.